Total pages in book: 142
Estimated words: 138526 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 693(@200wpm)___ 554(@250wpm)___ 462(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138526 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 693(@200wpm)___ 554(@250wpm)___ 462(@300wpm)
“She was sad, and she’ll never forgive us but she’s more understanding of it now. She agreed that it’s best we separate; she doesn’t want to be married to a man who is so entirely consumed by another woman.”
“I’m not enjoying this talk,” I admit, sipping more wine. Though I love to hear how badly he craves me that he can’t touch even his wife, but it fills me with grief and shame. Something I need to work on.
“I know. But I need you to hear me. This isn’t a plea to get you back, I’m not going to ask you to return to me after what I did. But I am going to tell you that there is nobody else for me but you. I’m so very sure of that.”
I sip even more wine hoping there’s another bottle as we have finished this one between us.
“This isn’t about jumping into marriage and babies. This isn’t about not being able to be alone. This is me telling you that I’m sure. I am so sure about you I haven’t once wondered if this is right between us. It has only ever felt right.”
God… that’s so sweet.
“I don’t expect your forgiveness for what I did, I want the chance to build a new image of myself to erase the old one.”
“Is that even possible?”
“I hope so. You deserved better from me and I want to prove to you that I can be better.” He motions to my wrapped gift on the floor by our table. “Open it.”
After handing it to me, I move my empty plate to the side and gently peel back the paper, revealing a dark blue box with a lid. He takes the paper and tosses it on the floor. His teeth scrape his lower lip and his eyes are anxious.
I reveal a stunning crystal vase with a beautiful flowing rose pattern climbing up the sides. There’s a clear section, an oval an inch below the top of the narrow opening.
There’s an inscription in the middle, it reads:
Fill me with love
“I’m confused,” I murmur, turning it this way and that, letting it catch the light. It’s so very pretty.
“There’s more in the box.”
I place the vase carefully beside the box and pull out a small rose-shaped notebook that is nestled in the velvet beneath, no larger than my palm. Attached to the top of it is a rose-gold pen, also small, no larger than my finger.
“I’m sensing a rose theme here,” I say, giggling as I open the notebook and then flip through the blank pink pages. “But I really am confused. Not that I don’t love it.”
“It’s something I had made especially for you. Like I said, I don’t want to just get you back and pick up where we left off. I want to earn it. I want to call you every day, and email you, and take you on the most marvelous dates.”
“What does that have to do with…?” I trail my fingers over the glass, feeling the grooves of each rose.
He smiles brightly, showing his incredible teeth. “Well, this is my promise to you. That until that jar is full of all the reasons you love me, I’m not moving on, I’m not giving up on what we have.”
“Reasons I love you?”
“Every time something new occurs that makes you love me even more, I want you to write it down, fold it up, and put it in the jar.”
I blink slowly and take his hand again. “I already know that I love you.”
“But you still feel the pain of what I did to you. By the time you’ve filled this vase full of positive things that you love about me, you’ll have hopefully put that pain far behind you. I want to erase it. I’m going to erase it.” His eyes are determined, his words even more so. “Until then, I’ll not ask you to return to me, I’ll not try and ease you into my bed.”
“What happens if it never fills.”
He lifts a shoulder, but I see sadness in his eyes. “Then I guess I’ll be single until I die.”
I roll my eyes, he can’t be serious, though he looks it. “What happens when it does?”
“That will be entirely up to you.”
Thoughtfully nodding, I unclip the pen from the notebook and write my first note:
He gives the best gifts. So thoughtful.
When I fold it and put it in the jar he leans over the table and kisses my hand. “I take it that you’re willing to give me time?”
“I don’t know, but I’d like to try and stay in touch now that you’re single.” I level him with a look. “But it’s going to be hard to trust you.”
“I can imagine, but I’m going to work for it. You’ll see. It’s only day one.”