Total pages in book: 106
Estimated words: 98226 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 491(@200wpm)___ 393(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98226 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 491(@200wpm)___ 393(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
“Joel? What’s going on?”
“Shhhh,” he said, smiling as he held his finger to his lips. “I’m trying not to wake my girlfriend up.”
I smirked at his slurred words, at how much he looked like the young boy I met at CU in that moment. His hair was mussed, his cheeks rosy, eyes a little glazed and low.
“Hmm… well, I think it’s safe to say she’s already awake.”
Joel launched himself into bed, climbing on top of me and wrapping me up like a burrito. “Well, in that case,” he said, leaning back long enough to peck my nose. “Hi.”
I chuckled. “Hi, there. How are you feeling?”
“A little tipsy.”
I arched a brow. “I can see that, but I meant are you still feeling sick?”
Joel shrugged. “Ah, I’m fine.”
His eyes were lazy as they watched mine, and he tucked my hair behind one ear, rubbing the skin there with his thumb. For a while, we stayed like that, and I knew by the way his brows bent together as he watched me that he could tell I was upset.
“We should talk,” I whispered. “About the other night at the party.”
“I can think of something a lot more fun than talking,” Joel replied, and then his hand slid back into my hair and gripped, arching my neck for better access. He kissed me hard, grinding his pelvis between my legs, and I felt how hard he was, his desire rolling off him in plumes.
And once again, it made me ill.
I closed my eyes, forcing a breath and kissing him back. I wanted to want it. I wanted to give in, to solve the issue with a makeup session so good that neither of us would remember why we were mad in the first place.
But then he grabbed my breast, and I remembered how he grabbed Ivy’s.
And a flash of Theo struck behind my eyes, making my stomach turn violently.
“Joel,” I said, pressing my hands into his chest to stop his next kiss.
“Come on, baby,” he pleaded, pressing just as hard against my palms. His lips captured mine again with another roll of his hips. “I want to fuck you so bad right now.”
It should have turned me on. It should have made me moan and reach for him in equal earnest, should have had me drenched with desire. Instead, it made me want to slap him so hard he’d be knocked out until the morning.
“Well, I want to talk,” I said, trying and failing to keep the disdain out of my voice.
Joel pressed himself on me harder, snaking his hand under my shirt. “We can talk after.”
“No, now,” I tried, but Joel laughed like it was a joke, squeezing my breast as he sucked the skin of my neck between his teeth.
And something in me snapped.
I kneed him hard between the legs, shoving him off me when he bent over in a groan of pain. I jumped up from the bed, crossing my arms. “I said no, Joel!”
He was still grimacing in pain, rolling from side to side with his hands cupped over his groin. “What the hell is wrong with you!?”
“You know what’s wrong!” I shook my head. “We haven’t so much as talked since the pool party and now you’re forcing yourself on me like—”
“I didn’t force anything,” he sneered. “God, when did you become so dramatic?”
“Dramatic?” I asked with a scoff.
“You kneed me in the balls, Aspen! Do you know how much that fucking hurts?”
His eyes were wild now as he watched me, like no version of him I’d ever seen before. Still, as mad as I was, I couldn’t help but feel bad when I looked at him still grimacing in pain with his hands covering his groin.
I sighed, my shoulders slumping. “Look, I’m sorry if I hurt you, but you really hurt me. And you’re still acting like I have no right to be upset.”
“You can be upset and not knee your fucking boyfriend in the balls!”
“I’m sorry. Okay? I am.” I reached out for him, and he relaxed marginally, though he was still wincing as he stretched out on his back and let his hands fall to his sides. “I just… I really need you right now.”
Emotion washed over me like a wave of smoke, choking my next words as tears flooded my eyes. Everything I’d talked to Juniper about rang in my ears, and desperation filled me to the brim.
Joel sighed, sitting up and brushing my hand off him as he stood. “I’m going back down with the crew.”
“Joel,” I said, grabbing his hand and making him face me again. “Don’t you see how torn up I am right now? We had this big fight, and then you were sick…” I shook my head. “I feel like… like I’m losing…” I couldn’t even figure out how to say it, so instead, I said, “we need to work through this. Together.”