Total pages in book: 136
Estimated words: 121153 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 606(@200wpm)___ 485(@250wpm)___ 404(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 121153 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 606(@200wpm)___ 485(@250wpm)___ 404(@300wpm)
He was worth more than these men were giving him. And yet he took it all. I loved that man. I loved him with a breathless, soul-shattering intensity.
Ruth tugged on my arm for me to move forward. Just as I was about to go, I saw my sisters standing to the back of the bar. Their beautiful faces were conflicted, riddled with uncertainty. But I did not blame them. I knew now the sacrifices you made for the man you loved.
I dipped my head at them. Maddie almost brought tears to my eyes when she lifted her hand and cast me a delicate wave.
I loved them, too. I loved them so much that I would let them go. They were no longer children needing my protection. I too had to move on.
“Bella?” Ruth said. I nodded my head and followed her outside, where two vehicles were waiting for us.
Ruth got into one with Solomon and Samson. Stephen sat in the front of the other. I had been surprised to discover that he could drive, having learned before he joined the commune. I climbed in behind my father.
Rider’s head was resting against the headrest, but his sad eyes were on me. Sudden emotion caused my eyes to prick with tears. I reached for his hand. “I am so proud of you, baby. So very, very proud.”
Rider’s eyes closed. He said nothing. And I did not push it. I would not shatter the fading strength that he was clinging to. I shuffled beside him and laid my head on his shoulder.
I held tightly to my husband as we drove past several empty fields. Stephen stopped the truck in front of a small wooden cabin. It had none of the grandeur and luxury of Mae’s or Lilah’s. It did not even look as well-kept as Maddie and Flame’s.
But my excitement grew nonetheless . . . this was to be our home.
“I’m sorry.” Rider suddenly said.
“Why?” I asked, my eyebrows drawn down.
“This,” he said, pointing at the cabin. “It’s a mess. Run down . . . less than you deserve.”
I met his eyes and shook my head. “No. It is ours. It will become our home. Looks do not matter, remember?” Rider searched my face doubtfully, then a smirk blossomed on his face.
We entered the cabin. It was small and in need of cleaning. But there was a large bed, and a couch. To me, it was a palace.
Ruth dressed the bed, and Rider moved slowly to it. He sat on the side of the bed, while I crouched down and untied his boots. Rider watched my every move.
I love you, I read on his face.
I love you too, I said with mine.
A throat cleared behind us. “We shall leave you alone to settle in,” Stephen said, casting his disappointed eyes around the shabby room.
“Thank you,” I said.
Solomon, Samson and Stephen left the cabin. Ruth came awkwardly to the bed as Rider lay down. He was tired; I could see his eyelids dragging down.
“Do you need me to stay and help you clean?” Ruth asked.
I shook my head. “No, I can do it. This place is not so big.”
Ruth nodded, then nervously approached her son. I moved out of the way, busying myself with the cleaning supplies Ruth had brought us. But I could not help but watch the tentative new relationship between mother and son with a lump in my throat. Rider watched his mother as she rounded the bed to stand by his side.
Ruth ran her hand along the edge of the bed. “Will you be okay here?”
“Yes,” Rider said in his low, fractured voice.
Ruth nodded. “Maybe I could come out to see you most days? If . . . if that is something you would want. It is okay if you do not, but—”
“Yes,” Rider cut in. “I”—he cleared his throat—“I would love that . . . to see you.”
The blinding smile that bloomed on Ruth’s face could light the darkest of skies. “Okay,” she breathed, “then I shall look forward to it.”
Ruth stood awkwardly, and carefully leaned forward to drop a sweet kiss to Rider’s forehead. Rider’s eyes closed at the touch.
My heart soared.
Ruth said goodbye and left the cabin, smiling at me as she passed. I glanced to the bed. Rider’s eyes were already on mine. I crossed the room and wrapped my hand around his. I sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over to kiss Rider’s soft lips. I ran my hand over his hair. “Sleep, baby,” I whispered. “Sleep.”
Rider’s eyes drifted shut, and in minutes, his breath evened out.
While he slept, I cleaned the cabin, finishing just as dusk began to bring its early curtain of darkness. Needing to get some fresh air, I stepped out into the humid night.
I sat down on a log that sat amid the wildly overgrown grass . . . and I breathed. I breathed and breathed, and allowed myself, for the first time, to let our new reality sink in.