Total pages in book: 84
Estimated words: 79040 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 395(@200wpm)___ 316(@250wpm)___ 263(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79040 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 395(@200wpm)___ 316(@250wpm)___ 263(@300wpm)
“Pranks?” I ask. I’m having to keep my responses to one or two word minimums to avoid laughing. My hand is over my mouth and I’m worried my eyes are watering now with the effort. “You’re going to have to be more specific. I don’t know what you mean.”
Vaughn’s jaw clenches and his father looks exceedingly embarrassed to even be a part of this whole encounter.
“The posters of me with fucking dirty underwear. What would I want with homeless people’s fucking dirty panties? Who would even believe that?”
I finally lose it. I snort first, then have to squeeze my eyes shut and compose myself before I look back up. Nolan is shaking slightly beside me, but doing a better job of keeping it together.
“I’m sorry,” I say slowly. “Did you say there are pictures of you with dirty homeless women’s panties and men’s tighty-not-so-whities all over the city? That sounds less like a prank and more like a personal problem. Or at the very least, a questionable moment to let someone take a picture of.”
Nolan makes a choked sound, then clears his throat and starts aggressively drinking his water.
Griffon rolls his eyes and blows out a long breath, staring daggers at his son.
Vaughn’s face has gone red. “It’s not real, asshole. It’s–it’s–” He sputters, waving his hand around in annoyance. “Photo editing bullshit, or something. And the same person is putting my personal office phone out there with all these dumb claims asking people to call the number. I had to get the number changed twice already, and the posters just keep changing with the new number.”
“I’m failing to understand why you needed to meet with us,” Nolan says. “So your son could confess about his fetish for dirty underwear?”
I’m grinning. “Or because you needed us to know you’ve got a thing for dirty phone sex with men? You should’ve just asked, Vaughn. I would’ve been happy to hop on a call some time.”
He practically leaps forward, fist coming down on the table as he points at me. “So you’ve read them!”
I shake my head. “They are everywhere. I’ve seen them, sure. Doesn’t mean I had anything to do with them. But they’re funny. I had no idea the number was leading to your office. I probably wouldn’t admit that to anyone else, by the way.”
“I told you how this would go,” Griffon snaps. “We’re done here.”
“Thanks for wasting our time,” Nolan says.
“No, this was great,” I say. “I’m going to get some extra joy every time I see those want ads or posters from now on. I had no idea you were letting it get to you so much.”
“I’m not,” Vaughn snaps as he stands. He runs a hand through his hair, but even more of it falls loose a moment later. “It’s childish. I’m too busy for this shit.”
“Busy with that new book?” I ask. “From what’s her name? Aubrey Drizzle?”
“Dizzie,” he says, voice suddenly cold. “And yes. It’s going to be a chart topper.”
“Bold claim. Is the author going to talk about where she got the idea from? What was her motivation? How long has she been working on this?”
Griffon’s eyes narrow. “That’s enough. She’s under contract with us already. Neither of you buffoons are getting your claws into her. Vaughn, let’s go.”
Before the men are out of sight, I see a homeless woman rush up to Vaughn. She lobs a huge, baggy pair of green panties at him. They land on his head, nearly draping over his eyes.
Vaughn jerks like he’s being electrocuted, flinging the panties off his head and staring in horror at what he just touched as it floats in a puddle by the road. “Did you just–”
“Yeah, you like that, pervert?” The woman cackles. “Found them this morning and thought they’d get your Johnson all Jimmied, Big Boy!”
Johnson all Jimmied? I’m watching in amused confusion.
“Fuck you,” Vaughn says, jabbing his finger toward me and Nolan, as if that was our fault. They cross the street, leaving behind the still-laughing woman.
I share a smile with Nolan and pull out my phone.
Jameson: Just talked to Vaughn. He’s not having a good time. Somebody has put up prank posters all over town and it’s making him miserable. Would be a shame if his ex-girlfriend showed up with a business rival he hates tomorrow night at the Halloween mixer, wouldn’t it?
Her text comes just moments later.
Charli: OMG. My friends are going to die. Not that we had anything to do with those, but… Yes. I think seeing us at the mixer really would sour his mood. I hope all our practice pays off.
Jameson: The costume is ready, by the way. Super slutty and sensible at the same time. You’ll love it. I’m not sure we’ve practiced enough, though. I’m feeling a little rusty. Maybe you could swing by tonight for a few practice reps?