Total pages in book: 127
Estimated words: 120708 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 604(@200wpm)___ 483(@250wpm)___ 402(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 120708 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 604(@200wpm)___ 483(@250wpm)___ 402(@300wpm)
The tears slipped free before I could stop them, and when Tanner noticed them, he looked as if he might drop to his knees. He took a few steps toward me and then stopped. “Do you really think I only thought of you that way?” he whispered.
I swallowed hard and shook my head. “I don’t think so.”
“You don’t think so?” he asked, an edge of anger in his voice.
“No, I don’t know, Tanner. Everyone has always thought of me as dispensable—it’s the only thing I’ve ever known.”
He slowly shook his head and backed toward the door. “Well, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m not everyone. I don’t think of you that way, and I never will. I’m going to walk away, Timberlynn, because I’m not sure what in the hell is going on, but if I don’t leave, I may regret something I say.”
And then he turned and walked to the door. Before he opened it, he looked back at me. “There is one thing I will say to you, though.”
I held my breath as he stared at me. “I don’t think my own heart can take this…game…we’re playing.”
A sob slipped free. “I’m not playing a game. This was never a game to me.”
“Okay, then, when you figure out what you want, let me know. I’ll be waiting.”
“Tanner, I…”
The words died on my lips. I had no idea how to explain how I was feeling. What a selfish bitch I’d been. Earlier I was flirting with him in front of his entire family, then I lashed out and accused him of not being trustworthy.
“I didn’t mean what I said. I’m just…I’m so confused, and you make me want things and feel things I’ve never felt before and I’m scared.”
“You don’t think I’m scared? Do you think giving your heart to a person is easy? I’ve never felt like this before in my life, Timberlynn. I’m willing to trust you with my heart…can you say the same about me?”
Before I had a chance to answer him, Dirk opened the office door. “Shit, sorry, I didn’t know anyone was in here.”
Tanner cleared his throat as I quickly wiped my tears away.
“Is everything okay?” Dirk asked, his eyes bouncing from Tanner to me.
Tanner didn’t say a word, he simply walked past Dirk and out the door. And in that moment, I knew what a breaking heart truly felt like.
“If that little prick said anything to hurt you, I’ll kill him.”
A laugh mingled with a sob as I shook my head. “No, he didn’t. But I’m pretty sure I just did one hell of a job pushing him away. Or, at the very least, confusing the hell out of him.”
“Is that what you wanted to do?” Dirk asked as he leaned against the doorjamb.
With a shake of my head, I closed my eyes and whispered, “No.”
“It’s not hard to notice the connection between the two of you,” Dirk stated.
I opened my eyes, wiped my damp cheeks, and took in a deep breath. No more crying for me. I was done and I needed to figure out how in the world I was going to fix this mess I had gotten myself into.
“Timberlynn.” Dirk’s voice was so kind and soft. “You don’t have to hide your scars, you know. Open up to him, and I promise he’ll help you heal them.”
My jaw muscles ached as I fought to keep myself from crying once again. Everyone in my life who mattered only had kind words to say about Tanner. So why had I let the gossiping fools get into my head. “What if I’ve totally messed up…”
Dirk raised a brow, causing me to instantly stop speaking. He smiled. “Doll, let me tell you something about the Shaw men. When they fall, they fall hard and they fall fast. And trust me when I say that the one who just walked out of here has fallen so freaking hard for you, that I think he might have gotten the breath knocked out of him. You didn’t mess anything up. He’ll come back around.”
“You don’t know that, Dirk. You don’t even know what happened.”
He walked over to me, gave me a once-over, and then grinned. “What I do know is that your past is keeping you from living your future.”
I lifted my chin and straightened my shoulders. “It is not. I’m moving on and I’m…I’m….”
“A future without someone to love is no future at all, Timberlynn. You and I both know that. Whatever happened can be fixed, at least I think it can. Tell me what happened.”
My cheeks puffed up as I exhaled. “The short of it?”
“Yep.”
“My father neglected me, my boyfriend cheated on me, my best friend at the time betrayed me, my father missed my birthday, I have some serious effed-up trust issues. I keep leading Tanner on, only to get spooked and then push him away. I told him I couldn’t trust him, but that’s not true. I found out tonight that my ex and the bestie are getting married. I got angry, and I took it out on Tanner. Then I said some things that were hurtful, and I didn’t mean it, and I’m pretty sure he’s already sick of the whiplash I’ve put him through. Oh, and did I mention I had daddy issues?”