Total pages in book: 103
Estimated words: 104766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 524(@200wpm)___ 419(@250wpm)___ 349(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 524(@200wpm)___ 419(@250wpm)___ 349(@300wpm)
“But my parents don’t live anywhere near school, and I have two semesters left.”
He has one.
And then there’s the draft…
We haven’t talked about his future at all, just mine.
“This will be like planning a wedding,” he informs me. “Let’s get a big binder and fill it with information.”
I laugh again, rolling back on the bed. “A binder? Stop it.”
He’s not entirely wrong, though. I guess the process will require a ton of planning because we’re so far apart.
"I’ll get a blue binder. You can have a pink one.”
“Why does my binder have to be pink? Why can’t it be blue?” Or yellow or sequins.
“You can have whatever color you want.” Drew's fingers tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, his touch gentle and reassuring. "We'll make sure our baby knows they're loved and cared for every step of the way."
Our baby…
I shiver.
“This whole thing is surreal. And if I’m being honest I don’t feel ready for it, at all. I had wanted to…I had wanted…”
“Wanted to what?”
“Date you. Date you and like, have you fall in love with me and then we could live happily ever after. We haven’t gone anywhere yet, not to dinner or to the movies, and it makes me sad in a way that the whole thing god sidetracked.”
I don’t want to say “screwed up” because the thought makes me feel guilty even having it; like I’m somehow talking shit about my unborn child.
“Yeah—in a perfect world, that’s how this would have gone. I mean—you falling in love with me and all that.”
He winks, our fingers brushing.
I move mine to his face; to brush the bruise on his mouth where my brother hit him.
“Does this still hurt?”
“No.”
“Are you telling the truth?”
“Yes.” He grins. “Do you know how many times I’ve been damn near knocked out from taking a hit or gotten concussions from a collision? Dozens. This little gash was a pussy move, and I’ll tell Grady I said so.”
“God, please don’t.”
He grins, that familiar twinkle in his eyes. "Well, if it's any consolation, our future just became the plot of a seriously entertaining rom-com."
Is it?
Really?
At least he’s optimistic and at least he’s here with me now.
“I can’t imagine doing this alone.” I have Miranda and I have my parents but it’s not the same. "Guess we're the stars of our own unique story."
"We aren't even dating, and now we're having a baby," he says, his voice a mix of incredulity and uncertainty. "Seriously, what are we going to do?"
My heart flutters like a trapped bird in my chest, fingers tracing the intricate patterns of the bedspread, my mind racing as I search for the right words.
"I have no idea."
The word hangs in the air, heavy with implications.
I shift my gaze to the window, where the world beyond seems to stretch out in a vast unknown. "But what about us? What about our friendship?"
Drew's voice is gentle, a soothing balm to my swirling thoughts.
"Our friendship.” He clears his throat. “Are you friend zoning me again?”
I let out a shaky laugh. “Do you not want to be friend zoned by your baby mama?”
“Not really.”
“So what do you want? To be my boyfriend?”
Ironically, it feels too soon.
We skipped a million steps in the process, jumping straight to ‘lifelong commitment’ of the offspring kind and it muddles the waters by a million.
Dating. Babies. School. Football.
Family.
Telling people. Not telling people. Keeping it private. Having our privacy invaded and our faces plastered on the news.
My tiny apartment. My roommates.
Classes.
Morning sickness. Going to the doctor. The fact that we’re long-distance.
Yeah. We definitely need binders.
Or five.
My head would spin if it wasn’t attached to my head.
“I would be your boyfriend.”
I squint at him. “Are you just sayin’ that because you knocked me up before our first date?”
He shrugs, which is comical.
How real could we possibly be tonight.
I would be your boyfriend.
His words settle over me like a comforting embrace, reminding me that strength often lies in the willingness to face the unknown—and he’s had his fair share of it, being a football player at a Big Ten school.
He smiles. "I won't pretend I have all the answers, Tess and we don’t have to figure this shit out tonight. But I do know that I'm here for you, for us. And together, we'll figure things out."
Together we’ll figure things out.
When, though?
“Why do you always say the perfect thing?”
Drew chuckles, his fingers lacing through mine. "I don’t. In fact, ask Drake—I say plenty of stupid shit and he probably has screenshots of most of it.”
As we lay there, side by side, the weight of the situation feels a little lighter.
"Hey. Promise me something," Drew says.
"What is it?"
"Promise me that we'll be honest with each other no matter what happens. That we'll communicate and not keep anything from each other. Finding out from the press was horrible—and not because I felt betrayed but because I thought you did it because you had no other choice. And I know that’s not true, but…no more surprises.”