Total pages in book: 178
Estimated words: 170884 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 170884 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
My eyes shut tight, I hugged myself under the covers as my guilt had my stomach dipping.
I was a horrible mother.
The door to my bedroom squeaked as it opened and I refused to open my eyes. I was being a coward, but looking into the soft brown hooded eyes of the man I loved was more than I could bear. It was a reminder of the lies and deceit, of the sheer heartbreak I felt, then and now, and I didn’t know whether I had it in me to deal with that at this very moment.
But then I heard his sweet voice. “Mummy, are you okay?”
Without a word, I lifted the covers and he slid under them. Something cold touched my arm, and I squinted through my hot, swollen eyes. “What have you got there?”
A.J. picked up an apple sandwich and bit into it. “Daddy made me a snack.”
My fragile heart cracked a little more. One more fracture and it would surely shatter into a thousand pieces.
“Oh, he did, did he?” I tried to keep my voice light, but it was harder than it sounded. “Is Molly out there too?”
“Yep,” he said, nibbling on his snack, and some of my tension fell away.
No way would Molly let A.J. go anywhere without her. I knew she would risk almost anything to keep him safe. Even from his father.
Speaking in low tones, A.J. asked, “Is it okay if Daddy stays a while?”
I thought about that and decided it was better to keep Twitch happy for the moment because it wouldn’t last long and an unhappy Twitch was not something to take lightly. I’d seen him upset. The memories still plagued me.
“Okay, baby, but just for tonight.” I would give myself today, but tomorrow, I came out swinging. “I need to speak to Molly, honey. Can you get her for me?”
“Okay. Feel better.” He kissed me with sticky lips and I loved him for knowing how much I needed it. The moment Molly came into the bedroom and shut the door, I whispered, “If he tries to take A.J., I want you to shoot him.”
No hesitation. “No problem.”
Good girl.
She left me be and I found sanctuary in the depths of my covers.
And now, back to my depression, for tomorrow, I’d come alive again.
***
Twitch
It was just after nine when I walked into my house to find Happy sitting at the table with Julius and Ana. I stalled a second, looking from brother to brother before I made my way in, lightly shutting the door behind me.
“You come to apologize?” I spoke directly to Julius, and when he glowered, I grinned. “Look at what you did to my face, Jay. I look like a beat-up sack of turds.”
Yeah, I didn’t know how to deal with this, so I did what I always did—became a wiseass.
But it was Ana who stood. She was so small, but the way she carried herself made her look even smaller. There was zero confidence in her stance, and I hated that because at one point, she was a different person. Her hands shook visibly as she opened her mouth to speak. Unfortunately, nothing came out, and from where I stood, it looked like perspiration lined her brow as she tried to focus on breathing.
My eyes met Julius’s. “What’s wrong with her?”
I wasn’t trying to be rude; I was just asking.
Julius held my eyes a moment then looked down at the table. “Ana has PTSD.” He didn’t look at me. “I don’t know why we’re here, but she wanted to come see you, so here we are.”
He sounded pissed, but he was here. That told me a bit about how much he loved his little sparrow. Interesting.
Without asking, I moved forward, closer to the woman, and looked into her face, overlooking the damaged eye and scars. “What’s up?”
Julius watched me closely, looking ready to pounce. That was when I heard her.
“Twitch, I need you to hold her still.”
I frowned down at her and muttered, “Huh?”
The fuck was she going on about?
“I hear it in my head sometimes.” Her voice was sluggish, quiet. “Manda said it that night, at Gio’s. You were there.” She took in a sudden breath before letting it out shakily. “I know you were. I was leaving, and you talked me back.”
Oh. I see. She remembered.
My jaw steeled.
I glanced at Julius, who now looked at me curiously, then licked my lips and spoke just as quietly, averting my eyes. “I’m glad you’re okay.”
From my place in the center of the room, I saw Julius go from confused to complete awareness, and when he closed his eyes and sighed, I knew he was caught up. “It was you.” Yeah, it was. “You called me that night.” Guilty, brother.
“You killed him,” the little woman breathed out because the words were too hard to speak at volume.