Total pages in book: 178
Estimated words: 170884 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 170884 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
My voice trembled. “I need to let you know that even if we can’t be together in the end”—God, it hurt—“I’m happy that you were a part of my life.”
At that, he put his hands to my shoulders, squeezing. He closed his eyes a second before he looked into my eyes, his eyes wide. “Are you—” I felt his hands shake against my skin. “Are you asking me to leave?”
Oh.
I frowned to myself.
I could see how he thought that.
“No,” I spoke softly. “No.” I reached up and took his hands in mine, and when I looked him deep in the eye and uttered, “I’m giving you an out,” his entire body went lax and he started to breathe again.
But I didn’t expect the reaction I got.
I expected understanding. I expected his appreciation. I did not expect raw fury.
He spoke through gritted teeth, pulling away from me, and I felt the loss on a personal level. “If you want in, be in. All in. But I’m sick of this shit, no bullshit.” Those soft brown eyes were suddenly hard. “I know you want me as much as I want you, so why the fuck aren’t you with me?” He closed his eyes and swallowed hard. “You’re my fucking religion, Lexi.” When his eyes snapped open, they pled with me, but his voice was uncharacteristically quiet. “Let me worship you.”
I didn’t understand it, but his anger seemed to feed mine. “You’ll have to excuse me for having doubts.” My hard gaze held his. “Especially when it comes to my son.”
“Our son,” he fumed, before he readjusted his tone. “He’s our son, Lex. We both had a part in making him. He’s ours.”
I immediately regretted what I said. “But only one of us stuck around.”
He stood and paced, and my chest ached. This was not what I had planned. I wanted a quiet conversation; I wanted simple answers, and what I got was a bubbling argument that only seemed to grow.
“So, what?” Tony uttered. “You want me out?” I never said that, but I was too stunned to speak. He obviously took this as a yes, because his next words were a pistol and they were aimed at me. “Listen to me, Alexa. A.J. could love us both.” He paused in his steps to lay his dark stare on me. “Or he can hate you. You decide.”
Bang.
My voice shook at the understanding of what he just said. “You asshole.”
And that was the moment he realized he’d fucked up. He put a hand to his hip and another to his forehead, lightly knocking his knuckles into his temple. He spoke through gritted teeth, his eyes shut tightly. “That didn’t come out right.”
“I think you need to leave.”
“I didn’t mean that.” He sighed.
My tone was whisper-soft. “You need to leave.”
“No.” He shook his head, trying to reason with me. “I’m staying right here. Ling’s fucking crazy. You think she wouldn’t think twice about coming here, hurting you?”
I was way past giving a solid fuck. “What do you care?”
When he lunged at me with his hulking body, it was so sudden a move I didn’t have time to react. He caught both my wrists in his hands, almost bruising, and he shook me, snarling, “Don’t you fucking get it? I would lay down my life for you.” When my wide eyes met his, he looked down at his hands and dropped my wrists, stepping back and looking away. “In fact,” he panted lightly, lost in his own head, “I already did.”
I rubbed at my wrists, not because it hurt, but because his rough touch burned me in a way I hadn’t felt for years.
And in true Twitch style, he walked down the hall, opened the front door, and stepped out, disappearing on me.
The moment he was gone, I missed him.
When I woke in the morning, feeling irritated beyond belief, I stepped out of my bedroom in my barely there nightie and was shot directly in the feels.
Son of a bitch.
I stilled midstep and watched the artfully decorated grown man lay on the floor with his shirt off as his son pressed colored markers to his skin, using him as his own personal coloring book.
The little monster looked up at me, smiling. “Hi, Mummy.” He gestured to his prone dad. “Look.”
I was looking.
He was beautiful.
And when he peered up at me, my throat closed over. Even more so when he uttered a cautious, “Mornin’, Mommy.”
Ugh. My heart. Not fair.
I cleared my throat. “You taking him to school this morning?”
“Of course,” he said, watching my face in a way that spoke volumes.
He was contemplating how much damage he’d done the night before.
I nodded, avoiding his watchful stare. “Okay. I’m going for a run.”
By the time I got out of the shower, they were gone, and when I stepped into my bedroom, my eye caught the blur of red on the nightstand.