Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 77415 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 387(@200wpm)___ 310(@250wpm)___ 258(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77415 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 387(@200wpm)___ 310(@250wpm)___ 258(@300wpm)
Too bad I was a worrywart and couldn’t figure out what in the hell I was supposed to tell the man who looked incredibly excited at his son’s accomplishment.
Dammit!
Chapter 18
I don’t even believe myself when I say I’m only going to have one glass of wine.
-Face of Life
Ellen
I nervously waited in the parking lot next to the other old ladies—who weren’t old, might I add—and fidgeted. I was working through whether or not to inform Jessie now or later about what happened with Margot, and I was clearly drawing the attention of the ladies at my side.
“So you never really told us what happened between you and Jessie,” Tally said. “It’s obvious that there was something there between the two of you before, but you’ve never really said anything about it.”
I looked at Naomi, warily, as she stared at me with the same curiosity.
“Jessie and I were together when we were in high school,” I murmured softly. “He left. End of story.”
“A woman like you doesn’t wait a lifetime and leave a man like Sean, for someone that she isn’t still in love with,” Naomi pointed out.
I cleared my suddenly dry throat.
“I still feel like there is this animosity between us, and I’m not entirely comfortable telling you more than I have,” I told her the truth. “That’s not to say that one day I won’t be, but you intimidate me.”
Tally snorted. Imogen, on the other hand, looked at me like I was nuts.
“Do you really think that’s going to stop us from getting the truth out of you?” she questioned. “We realize that you’re not entirely comfortable with us. You feel like you don’t belong, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. You’re just as much a part of us as anyone standing here. You may not be married in, but you’re ours.”
“I don’t know what you really want me to say that will make you feel better,” Naomi started almost the moment that Imogen finished. “Sean is my world. Though, he wouldn’t be if you hadn’t left him. I can’t say that I’m happy you caused him pain by leaving him, but I can say that I will forever be grateful that you knew it wasn’t right for you and left him before you broke him.”
I bit my lip.
“And,” she continued. “I don’t blame you for what happened to me.”
My eyes went wide.
How could she not blame me for what happened to her? She’d lost a child because I’d taken her away from her safe place. Sure, I’d done so on her insistence, but it’d still been my doing.
“I can see that you blame yourself, but you really shouldn’t,” Naomi murmured softly. “Everything that happened that night was of no one’s doing but a madman’s,” she explained. “Sure, it was more my fault that I went off and did something stupid, but in no way, shape or form did I ever blame you for what happened to me and neither should you.”
I looked down at my toes and wondered how long was acceptable to not say anything. Because had I opened my mouth right then, my voice would’ve cracked with unshed tears.
The gift this woman was giving me wasn’t something she realized yet.
I’d always been on the outside. Always.
In grade school, I’d been Tommy Tomirkanivov’s little sister who everyone thought was a little bit weird because she would rather read than play. In high school, I’d been the band geek who knew how to play a mean clarinet but was too scared to compete so I never went to any of the football games.
And then I’d met Jessie. He’d been the one and only person in my whole entire life that had known me for me. He hadn’t cared that I’d rather read than watch a movie. He hadn’t cared that I was a little on the weird side. He only cared about me.
I never once doubted his loyalty to me.
But he’d been the only person besides my family—and even they were iffy sometimes—who cared about me enough to bring me into his life.
And now, here were these women, offering me a place among them.
I didn’t know what the hell to say. I couldn’t form coherent thoughts.
“We’re all crazy here.” Tally threw her arm around me. “Welcome to the crazy girl club. The wine is fine.”
I snorted and tilted my head.
“Was that wine in your cup?” I challenged her.
Tally batted her eyelashes at me.
“I turned twenty-one. I should be able to drink whatever and whenever I want,” she shot back.
I snorted.
“I think that’s all kinds of illegal, but whatever floats your boat,” I eyed the Yeti tumbler in Tally’s hand, wondering if it did, indeed, contain wine.
“You’ll never know,” Tally teased, upending the cup and taking a healthy pull.
I giggled and turned away, surveyed the parking lot.
It was still going strong as the boys made their way out of the locker room.