Total pages in book: 32
Estimated words: 30055 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 150(@200wpm)___ 120(@250wpm)___ 100(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 30055 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 150(@200wpm)___ 120(@250wpm)___ 100(@300wpm)
“Did you at least use protection?”
“No.”
I see his hand grip the steering wheel tighter. “What if you’re pregnant? That would ruin...” He meets my eyes. “It would spoil you for anyone else. You know I don’t agree with abortion, but maybe in this case—”
“I can’t believe what I’m hearing. You’re such a hypocrite. So you’re happy to persuade other girls to keep babies they don’t want, but you’ll march me down to the clinic if I’m pregnant? I’m not, by the way.”
“How do you know?” Those words could have venom in them, but they don’t. I hear hope in his voice, like I might be able to reassure him, and it’s setting me on edge. What is going on?
The truth is, I don’t know that I’m not pregnant. But the thought scares me, because I’m not sure what it would mean if I was. When I don’t answer, he slams his palm against the steering wheel and curses under his breath but doesn’t try to speak to me again.
I find my phone and bring up my last text conversation with Jillian. She has no idea what’s going on, and I have to fill her in. I need an adult conversation with someone that isn’t going to judge me.
As I start typing out a message, my father speaks again, but his voice is hesitant, like he’s thinking out loud rather than talking to me.
“Hopefully you’re right. Yes. We’ll just have to hope you’re not pregnant. With any luck, this will all go away. That man has been arrested, he’ll be going to prison, and he’ll probably forget all about you. It’s not like you’re anything special.”
That last comment, even though it didn’t sound like it was directed at me, hits me hard. “You don’t think I’m special?”
“Oh, that’s not what I meant. Don’t twist my words, Kristina.”
“It’s not like you’re anything special.” I mimic his voice. “Hard to read that any other way, dad. Jesus Christ.”
“Kristina! I don’t know where you’ve picked up this habit of swearing and cursing, but don’t for one second think that William is going to stand for it when the two of you are married.”
I grunt. “I’m not marrying William. I can’t stand him.”
“You’ll do as I tell you. He was going to propose today. Yes, you heard me, that’s why I was so desperate to get hold of you. He was going to officially ask me to give him my only daughter’s hand. That’s a big deal, Kristina, and you nearly ruined it. He’s rethinking the idea, but I think I can talk him round, keep him on board. It’s what he wants, really, and it will make everything all right again.”
“Talk him round? Aren’t you listening to me? I am not going to marry him. You’re delusional.”
I type out a text to Jillian as I speak: Things are a total mess. Not sure what I’ve done. I thought I was in love, but he’s been arrested for starting the fire and now dad’s going on about me marrying Pastor Creepy.
“Of course you’ll marry him, Kristina. It’s the right thing to do. Time to step up and accept some responsibility in your life.”
Jillian: Slow down. Who’s been arrested?
Me: Wrath. The biker. We had sex, and now it’s a mess.
“Your mother would want you to follow in her shoes, Kristina. Be the good, devoted wife, like she was. Raise good Christian children. Anyway, the deal is done, I’ll persuade him that this is what he wants and we’ll all be happy.”
“I won’t! I’m not marrying him, dad.”
“Yes you are, Kristina. You have no choice in this.” He reaches across and hits the door lock button, like I might try to dive out of the car right here on the highway.
“What are you doing? Are you mad? I’m not your captive, you can’t force me to marry someone against my will.”
“You’re my daughter, and you’ll do as I say. That’s the end of it. You’ll do as I—and your dead mother—tell you.”
Jillian: Where are you? You need me to come over?
Me: I’m not sure what I need. I think I’ve really messed up. Dad’s gone crazy. The fire must have messed with my head. I had sex with a man that tried to kill me, now he’s been arrested and somehow my mother wants me to marry William.
Jillian: Your mother...isn’t she...?
“It’s all set, Kristina, and I know you won’t let me down. Things will be good, you’ll see, I know what’s best for you better than you do.”
Me: What have I done, Jillian?
9 | Wrath
“Wrath, man, what the fuck is going on? We all know you didn’t start that fire.”
I snort a laugh as I shake my head. “Of course I didn’t start it. Put her in danger? I’d rather douse myself in petrol and play with a lighter.”