Total pages in book: 213
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
“I heard about Rick,” I tell her and as I do, I feel Allie’s small hand brush against mine, so I take it. It’s funny how that little touch makes my heart hammer harder but in a way, it’s calming.
My mother breaks eye contact and looks past me as I tell her I’m sorry for her loss.
“I’m sorry too,” Allie says politely but in a voice that’s genuine and full of pain.
“Yeah … well, thanks,” my mother says coldly, dismissively.
“Mom,” I say, and it feels odd calling her that, so I have to pause before continuing, “this is Allison. Allison, this is my mother.”
I introduce them and Allie steps forward with her hand out to give my mother a handshake, even though she’s still standing two steps higher than us.
True to form, my mom’s a fucking bitch, leaving Allie hanging there with an empty hand held high. She looks at Allie good and hard before nodding her head and saying, “Hi.”
The air turns frigid around me when I see Allie’s face fall. Allie’s innocent in all this. I shouldn’t have brought her here.
Taking a large step forward, I shield Allie from my mother. “Just wanted to tell you that I’m doing fine, if you were wondering.” My words come out hard and bitter. I don’t know what the good doctor was thinking or what I was thinking when I decided to take his advice.
But there, I’ve told her, so we can get the fuck out of here.
“Fine? Is that what you call getting arrested?” My anger falters, even if just for a moment while my mother’s face forms a twisted sneer. “I always knew you were no good.”
I bite my tongue and hold back the explanation. She doesn’t deserve one.
Just as I’m about to tell her goodbye forever, Allie steps around me, brushing against my leg as she shoves herself in front of me.
She’s short, shorter than both me and my mom and she has to crane her neck to look in my mother’s hard eyes as she tells her, “He was trying to do the right thing.”
I haven’t seen Allie angry really. I’ve seen her want to run, or pick a fight. But I’ve never seen her pissed like this. Her little hands fisted at her side. Her chin held high and her eyes narrowed. It’s sweet of her, but I wish it weren’t because of me.
“I’m sure,” my mother says and then pulls out another cigarette. She lights it and adds, “If you’re here for money, Rick didn’t leave anything to you.”
My body tightens and my heart feels like it’s being squeezed. It fucking hurts. I can’t deny it.
I don’t know why what she said pains me even more. Not that Rick didn’t give me anything, but that she’d think I’d come back here looking for a handout.
Then again, money’s the only thing that ever mattered to her.
“He’s not going to do anything with his life, so you should really consider your other options,” my mother tells Allie. She nods her head condescendingly as she speaks to Allie and doesn’t even bother to look at me.
“What a bitch,” Allie says with a high-pitched voice, looking my mother directly in the eye. “You didn’t tell me she was this much of an asshole.” She turns her head to look at me with disbelief and then seems to check her anger when I don’t respond.
“Your son’s a good man and I have no clue how he got lucky enough to get away from you.”
My mother laughs. “Aww, sweetheart, I hope you enjoy getting your heart broken.”
Allie opens her mouth again, and her face is scrunched up as she bites her tongue. She’s letting my mother get the best of her.
The difference between these women is simple. Allie cares; my mother doesn’t.
I wrap one arm around Allie’s waist and pull her in close to me, letting her ass press against my upper thigh and cut her off.
“Like I said, just wanted to give you my condolences.”
Allie peeks up at me with a bewildered look. “Let’s go,” I tell her softly, not bothering to tell my mother goodbye.
ALLISON
“Are you angry with me?” I ask Dean and then try to swallow. But I can’t. There’s a spiked lump in the back of my throat that won’t go away.
I know I’m a bitch. I’ll be the first to admit it.
I like to hate people before they can hate me. I’ll call them out, but I call myself out on my own shit. I know it doesn’t make it right, though.
“I didn’t mean to upset you when I called your mother a bitch… or an asshole. Whatever the hell I said to her.” Even as I give him the apology, I feel awkward and like I’ve done him a disservice. He wanted to make things right with her and I think I just made things even worse. I don’t even remember what all I said.