Total pages in book: 108
Estimated words: 103721 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 519(@200wpm)___ 415(@250wpm)___ 346(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103721 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 519(@200wpm)___ 415(@250wpm)___ 346(@300wpm)
His words send shivers down my spine as my heart thuds for this man standing before me. “I chose you because I didn’t want to do this with anyone else.”
Benson nods, his eyes hooded as he looks down at me. “And you don’t know what that does to me, honestly.”
I feel like it’s the same for me, but I don’t say that. I just hold his gaze, pulling in deep breaths so I don’t pass out. Neither of us says a word as he angles his body closer to mine, making it real hard not to touch him. He takes my hand in his, threading our fingers before bringing my hand to his lips. He places a small kiss on the back of my hand and then another to my wrist before his eyes meet mine. With so much emotion in his voice, he says, “I have a new…I’m not using arrangement because you’ve made me hate that word.”
I can’t help but grin at him. “The word did nothing to you.”
“No, but your intent with it did,” he tells me, moving even closer to me. “You intended to keep me at arm’s length, but I’m not playing that game with you.”
“No?”
“Fuck no,” he promises, my gaze trapped by his as he tightens his fingers around mine. “I want another chance at us.” Oh, how that thrills me, but it also scares the ever-loving shit out of me. “I can see your thoughts in your eyes, Cam. Tell me what you’re thinking?”
His request for my thoughts has my heart clenching in my chest. I don’t know what I’m thinking or what I’m feeling or even what I want. “I didn’t even think you still liked me like this.”
His lips perk at the sides. “How could I ever stop?”
“I thought it was all for show.”
“For you, yeah, but only for you.”
I lean into his hand, so pleased by his response but knowing I’ve gotta keep my wits about me. Benson gathers me in his arms, bringing his hand up to the back of my neck, where he tangles his fingers in my hair. I’m breathless as I gaze up at him, wanting so desperately to kiss him but not doing so for the simple fact that I’m scared.
He squeezes my scalp as his eyes bore into me. “Talk to me.”
“It’d be so easy to fall back into what we were, and I don’t want that.”
“Neither do I,” he agrees, leaning down so that his nose slides along mine. “So, here are my arrangement terms.” My lips curve at how he says the word with such vengeance. “Date me for real and use the insights for your project.”
“But not the script?”
“Fuck the script, Cameron.”
I grin. “But we were supposed to break up at the end of the six months and announce it, see what that does—”
He shakes his head, cutting off my words. “Yeah, that’s not happening.”
“It was in the script I gave you.”
“I didn’t read that shit,” he admits, and I laugh. I watch as his eyes drift shut, and the smallest of smiles comes across his thick lips. He leans in, so close to where his lips almost touch mine. “Give me a second chance, Cam. A real chance.”
It’s difficult for me to believe this is happening. After everything that went down, he still wants a chance with me? It almost doesn’t seem real, but I can feel his lips and smell the wine on his breath. I can feel the heat of his body. I swallow hard as my insides yearn for him, yet my brain is telling me I’m not good enough. But even that thought doesn’t make sense. My brain is really mean sometimes. Like, damn, whose side is it on? One look at Benson and I know he’s on my side… yet I’m tearing myself down when this man has his arms around me and is asking for one thing.
The same thing I want.
Still, needing to be sure, I ask, “Shouldn’t I be the one asking for the second chance?”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Benson
I’ve achieved everything I’ve ever worked for.
When I was slinging llama shit, I was also slinging pucks. Even when I was up until midnight doing homework, I had my stick in my hand, one-handedly playing with a puck. I used my ice time to my advantage, up and on the ice before everyone else. I knew I had to keep my grades up if I wanted to get into a D1 school, so I used to listen to my lessons while I skated. While I was working on the farm, I used my stick to do much of the work. Guiding llamas, cleaning the pens, and I used to practice tip-ins with snacks for the animals.
I worked hard to get noticed, and I was rewarded.
When I wanted to leave home for America, I put in all the paperwork. I walked to the local library to use the internet and fax machine to send my forms of intent. When I was chosen for the billet program, I sat for hours with my coach to find the family I wanted. I mean, no one was as awesome as the Adlers. Elli and Shea had come to Canada to watch me play. Had dinner with my family, promised they’d take good care of me and love me as their own. Not that my parents cared. But even knowing I was going to pick the Adlers, I still took the time to make sure I was going to the best.