Total pages in book: 152
Estimated words: 140629 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 703(@200wpm)___ 563(@250wpm)___ 469(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 140629 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 703(@200wpm)___ 563(@250wpm)___ 469(@300wpm)
The pain in his voice was so shocking that Caspian hugged him back without thinking, his mind ablaze with sympathy. For him, playing the piano was a skill, for other people it was a job, maybe a passion, but Gunner had only been able to play for the short three weeks he’d spent in Caspian’s body, so it hadn’t occurred to Caspian that he might have missed it.
Yet the massive man who had enough strength to turn people’s faces into bloody steaks was crying over his inability to play an instrument, as if he’d just lost a dearest friend.
“I… I’m sorry, Gun. I had no idea you enjoyed it so much,” Caspian whispered, pressing his face to the meaty chest in order to embrace him fully. He could sense every tremor passing through the firm body, and stroked Gunner’s back to soothe him.
“It’s… it’s like magic to me. It takes me to a different world and brings back happy memories, like a light at the end of a dark tunnel. And when I played myself, I felt like I could reach that light and feel its warmth on my skin. Doesn’t matter now, does it?”
Caspian knew Gunner had a romantic side to him, but he’d never expected he could be so poetic. With his throat tight, he gently wiped the tears off the stern masculine features and was on the verge of pulling him down, so their lips could meet like they used to. But he couldn’t. Gunner wouldn’t have appreciated it, and Caspian shouldn’t use this moment of weakness to satisfy his selfish need. Regardless of how much he wanted to curl around Gunner and protect him from everything that might end up hurting his soft insides, Caspian shook off the silly notion of them maybe, possibly getting back together.
He cleared his throat. “I could teach you.”
Gunner took a deep, raspy inhale, staring at the ceiling, as if he were afraid to meet Caspian’s gaze. “I’d like that. But let’s be real. It will take years. I even had this idea I could teach the piano if I learned to play, but who’d let me anywhere near their kid?”
Caspian’s chest tightened, as if ribs were curling around his lungs and heart to protect them from sadness. But it was no use, because the regret twisting Gunner’s face kept making him bleed. “I’m sorry,” he said and offered Gunner the firmest hug.
Caspian’s toes curled when warm fingers swept across his nape.
“It is what it is. I thought I was over it, but then you played, and I fell apart. I’m such a mess. But who knows? Maybe if I get the basics in five years or something, I could become a viral sensation on the internet? ‘Looks like a thug, but plays Mozart’,” Gunner said with a bitter note to his voice.
He was joking, but Caspian knew him well enough to realize it was a ploy to hide Gunner’s true feelings.
He needed protection. Maybe not his body but definitely his heart, and Caspian would do anything in his power to make life work out for Gunner in one way or another.
“You know, if you decided to stay here after all, we could have lessons every day.”
Caspian could sense the battle inside of Gunner in the prolonged silence, and held his breath. Stay, stay, stay…
“Would that really be okay? With your parents and stuff?”
“Yes,” Caspian said almost too fast. “This is a huge house, and they already agreed to it, because I told them about your trailer.”
Gunner licked his lips. Caspian had liked him all small and cute, but the gentle giant wasn’t any less adorable. “But you’ll tell me if it starts feeling weird, yeah? I don’t want to ruin this.”
Caspian swallowed, entranced by the raw emotion in Gunner’s eyes. He took his hands and squeezed them, standing a bit closer than just a friend should, but their intimacy had long gone beyond friendship. “You won’t.”
Chapter 31 – Caspian
A week had passed, but each night Caspian would step out of his bedroom and walk down the corridor, hoping Gunner might open his door and invite him in. It never happened, and Caspian didn’t want to make Gunner feel pressured into anything just because they now lived together.
There was no denying facts, though—Caspian missed Gunner. Not his presence, because they spent lots of time together, but the kind of relationship they used to have, and which had been cut short by reality. He’d never been into big, tall guys, but Gunner was… well, he was Gunner, and while it made Caspian self-conscious that he was again so much smaller than his sort-of-ex, who very clearly told him he liked buff, dominant men, he couldn’t shake off the thought that maybe he was overthinking things. Maybe their bond went beyond looks and wouldn’t matter to Gunner either?