Total pages in book: 134
Estimated words: 130159 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 651(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 130159 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 651(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
“Don’t trouble yourself, brother. I’m doing fine here with Jack and Connor.” Despite the fact they were alone, he lowered his voice as if he didn’t want anyone to overhear him. “The struggles I’m experiencing are purely mine. I don’t understand where I fit in.”
“With the twins?”
“With this new world as a whole…but with the twins, too. I realize they go to college. I don’t think that’s for me. You know I’m used to working the land, maintaining a farm, and caring for my family. I felt aimless until I found that community gardening project I was telling you about.” He wrinkled his nose. “But I’ve been surprised by all the chemicals they’re willing to put on the food they grow. I’ve tried to teach them the old ways…” He sighed.
Beck figured that had been unsuccessful, based on his expression. “Out here, people want what’s fast and easy. So…did Jack and Connor poke fun at you for helping with the gardening project?”
If they had, Beck didn’t care if they were Seth’s brothers, he would smash their heads together.
“Not at all. They didn’t want to participate, and that was all right. They said they were city boys, which I took to mean they know nothing about farming.”
“I doubt they do. I’m serious, if you want to move to the condo, we’ll make that happen. It’s a bit farther from my house, but—”
“Thank you, but I’m fine here. I’m just trying to understand if this society expects me to be more like them than like me.”
That question set Beck back. Of course Zach knew who he was—in the context of The Chosen. For the first time in his life, he had the power to think what he wanted, do what he wanted, and be who he wanted. That much freedom all at once could be confusing, maybe even scary.
“You don’t ever have to be anyone but you, Zach.”
“Without the structure of the church and the town, I’m not sure who that is. I don’t believe what I once did. I still think God exists, but He’s not the deity Father, Jed, and the elders paid lip service to because they wanted to marry more and younger women.”
“I understand. I found this counselor, someone experienced with situations like yours. I’ll call her if you want to talk to her and—”
“No. I’m not so much confused about this world, just my place in it. If I’m no longer a farmer or a husband, what am I supposed to do? I have enough money to last the rest of my life, according to Agent Waters. But I have no purpose. I worried about that…until I realized the twins don’t, either. At least not that I’ve seen.”
No wonder Zach was confused. “Unlike Messiah City, few students here go to school year-round.”
“They explained that they were on summer break.” But he still seemed perplexed about what that meant.
“Seth says the twins are planning to get jobs while they’re here this summer.”
“They told me.” Zach frowned. “But so far, their top priorities have been drink, women, and baseball.”
“Then, yeah.” Beck smiled. “That makes them pretty normal for their age.”
“Don’t they want more out of life?”
Of course Zach had never seen behavior like this. Hedonism and idleness had never been tolerated in Messiah City, but the fact he wasn’t outright rejecting Jack and Connor or their behavior said that his mind was opening. “The thing about out here is that most people mind their own business. As long as you’re not breaking laws—you know, killing or stealing and the like—there’s no right or wrong way to do life. You just do what gets you where you want to go, whatever makes you happy. Have the twins brought women here?”
Zach nodded. “Both the night they arrived and last night.”
Jesus, they’d been here two days and they’d gotten laid twice? Good for them, but…confusing as hell for Zach. “Are you uncomfortable?”
“I was at first. Now I’m…curious.”
Three weeks ago, Zach had admitted that he’d been without his late wife’s “comfort” for weeks. If he’d been horny then, how desperate must he be now? “And that’s okay. There’s no value judgment here if you find a woman to spend the night with. Make sure she’s over eighteen.”
Zach grimaced. “I’d like to spend time with someone closer to my age.”
The fact his brother didn’t want to get naked with a female the law had recently considered a child was fantastic in Beck’s book. “Then do that. You’ll find plenty of women in their twenties who are single and fun and…”
“Not expecting a man to marry her in order to have sex with her?”
That was a change in Zach’s vernacular, which must be the twins’ doing. “Exactly.”
His brother nodded. “I drank a beer last night.”
Wow, Jack and Connor really were having an influence on him. “And?”